Hens Laying Eggs

The sun is going down behind the mountain
As we drive home from work.
I’m listening to you talk about your day.

“Did you know that hens eventually stop laying
eggs?” I ask you as you head under Austin Bluffs.
“I guess it makes sense, really, if you think about it.
I guess they go through menopause just like people,
but I had never thought about it before. Had you ever?”

Glancing over at you, I see a look of utter confusion.
I think back on our conversation and realize I’ve
jumped subjects once again.
I’ve hopped from the tax return season to chicken menopause.

I’m abashed. This happens all too frequently.
I find too many wonderful things to notice and
think about while talking about other wonderful things
I’ve noticed and thought about.

You quietly ask, “Were we talking about hens?
Where did that come from anyway?”

I try to explain about seeing the article in
my latest issue of Country Living a few minutes prior,
but in the middle of my explanation I start talking about
another topic that has caught my attention.

I’m truly not an airhead, a ditz, nor a flake.
I don’t think I have Alzheimer’s…yet.
Perhaps I have Attention Deficit Disorder?
Or maybe I’m so smart my mouth…
……can’t keep up with my brain?   (Bah!!)

On the other hand, maybe my brain
can’t keep up with my mouth?
All I know is, I’m happy 90% of
my waking hours and 100% of my
sleeping hours (when I can’t talk).

I read somewhere it’s rare to be
that happy most of the time.
So, maybe, having a mismatched brain
and mouth isn’t so bad if it
creates happiness?

Or maybe I’ll never quit laying eggs…

Chicken and Eggs

© D. Elaine Wood-Lane
2/25/16

My Morning Thus Far…Sidetracked Much?

Sunshine Lane Services

A major fault of mine when I’m cleaning house is a tendency to get sidetracked by…anything! This morning is a perfect example: I start laundry, sit down a moment to message some people. Washer finishes. I go and switch loads–towels in the dryer, whites in the washer. Come back, get broom to sweep kitchen floor. Realize I still have a Christmas tin that contained popcorn in the corner of the kitchen on the floor. I pick it up and think, “Wow! This would be perfect to put my current yarn project in! I could poke a hole in the plastic part of the lid and voila! Instant yarn holder. Except the Christmas scenes are a bit much. I think I have some shelf lining paper that I could put on the outside to make it pretty. Where is that? Hmmm, I think it’s in the basement storage area.” 

I proceed…

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My Morning Thus Far…Sidetracked Much?

A major fault of mine when I’m cleaning house is a tendency to get sidetracked by…anything! This morning is a perfect example: I start laundry, sit down a moment to message some people. Washer finishes. I go and switch loads–towels in the dryer, whites in the washer. Come back, get broom to sweep kitchen floor. Realize I still have a Christmas tin that contained popcorn in the corner of the kitchen on the floor. I pick it up and think, “Wow! This would be perfect to put my current yarn project in! I could poke a hole in the plastic part of the lid and voila! Instant yarn holder. Except the Christmas scenes are a bit much. I think I have some shelf lining paper that I could put on the outside to make it pretty. Where is that? Hmmm, I think it’s in the basement storage area.” 

I proceed to the basement storage area. “Good grief! How did we let this get so messy?! Oh! There’s where I put my purses! Hmmm, but where is the shelf lining paper?” I move some boxes, putting some in another box to throw away later. No shelf lining paper anywhere. Suddenly I espy a couple of teddy bears in a plastic storage bin and have to peek inside to see what else is there. “Oh wow! This is Mother and Daddy’s stuff, or at least some of it is. There are the pictures of Joe’s kids in 1986. Aren’t they all pretty? Oh, oh! And here are pictures of the boys when they were little! I wondered where these went!” I proceed to go through the entire plastic bin, finding cards, letters, a guest book for Daddy and Mother’s 50th Anniversary party. At first I think it’s a sign in for one of their funerals, but then figure out it was their anniversary party because all five of we kids have signed in it and that’s the only time all five of us were in the same place at the same time. (Weird, huh?). I figure out that basically this plastic bin is a time capsule for 1986 with some extra stuff from about the following 10 years. I pick and choose some things to bring upstairs to look over. Then I see, in another clear plastic bin under a roll of carpet, my elementary school memory book so I peek inside that bin too.  “Ooooh!  Some school pictures of the boys!! And Nat’s baby book and…”  I get distracted by the plastic bin next to this been and see my high school year books, an old quilt I’ve had so long I’ve forgotten where it came from, and more baby things that were my sons’.  I suddenly realize I have to stop or I’ll be lost in the basement all day and I have a house to clean!  “Now, what did I come down here for in the first place?”  I pause, looking around, and suddenly remember, “Oh yeah! Shelf lining paper! Well, I don’t see that so I guess I better get back upstairs.” 

And that is how I ended up with this stack of stuff on my side table, an unswept kitchen floor, as yet, and two dogs sitting in my lap.  I WILL, as God is my witness, get this house cleaned up today!  As soon as I look through these pictures and things… 

 

Please Wait…

This week has been a wild ride

 in more ways than usual.

First it snowed so much that,

  no one could ride anywhere.

Then I started a new job,

 where I arrived by sheer luck

 for training, training, training,

 and, did I mention, training?

My mind is not as elastic as it used to be.

A complete two inch binder 

 of information,

 about caring for the elderly, 

 was crammed into my mind this week.

I wonder what info was lost?

I guess if I run into you and smile and say, 

  “Hiiiii! How are you doing?”

    and never say your name,

    You’ll know your name was some data 

   that was overwritten or lost. Please forgive me.

My mind decided knowing CPR was more 

  important than names of dear friends,

  and that knowing how to help an

  elderly person fall gently

   is more important than

  my passwords for

  OverRide and GoodReads.

So what I’m saying is…

  if you run into me somewhere and,

  I seem a little distracted and blank faced,

  it’s because I lost part of my data

  this week and I’m trying to recover it.

Please wait…

  

 
©Elaine Wood-Lane

2.6.16